I'd like to start by saying that as a new writer I love feedback - positive, negative, ambivalent. All of it, and I am very appreciative of anyone who takes the time to comment on my work - not just on here but in my writing group and elsewhere. Now for my question. Does anyone have any tips on how to decide which feedback to respond to? I'm not talking about the correction of grammar etc as obviously this should be changed, and my grammar is not what it used to be. But more the feedback about the style, pace, tone of your writing? Writing is such a subjective thing and I know what one person loves another person will hate, and others will simply not have a feeling about one way or another. And the old adage you can't please all of the people all of the time is no better demonstrated than when asking for feedback on the baring of your soul (that's how I feel about writing anyway). But how do others decide which feedback to listen to when it's contradictory? I'm lucky to have had some very positive feedback and also some very helpful constructive feedback too, as well as some that's just been plain rude (not from anyone on here I hasten to add) but I've got a fairly thick skin and even the rude ones have made me think. And I have no doubt it's helped me to improve my writing significantly. But what if the feedback starts to change your writing style? And you're not sure whether this is a good or bad thing? I feel so close to my work, even after a few weeks of not looking at it, that I just can't see which is better - the before or the after?
Thanks in advance for your thoughts
Sometimes we want people to like our writing so badly that we edit it to death (I speak from experience), and often the writing can become forced if we're trying to please everyone.
Your individual style is what will bring readers to your books.
Criticism is great, and websites like this are good to get a flavour for what people think (especially for pace), but I wouldn't take much more from it than that (in my opinion) as even agents and editors will have different opinions on your books.
My advice would be to read as many published (not self-published) books as possible and glean experience from that.
You're right. Writing is completely subjective, but in a year or two you will notice yourself how much progress you've made. I've looked back at my MS's which I've thought were perfect and physically cringed. You'll become your own best critic.
One case in point, I loved how you made Gabriel in your first upload on here. The difference in tone was subtle, but perfect. I enjoyed reading his part a lot more in this one, compared to the second. I think it was because he seemed so cool and collected, and if he is going to be the villain, that goes really well with what I'd assume to be his personality. But that doesn't mean the 2nd one is bad, it just means for me, the first was easier to imagine - 1 person out of hopefully a million people who would come to read it.
Regarding bad feedback and people who are generally rude, you only have to pop over to Goodreads, pick one of the best written books you know of, and read the reviews. You'll find some horrible things that people have written - and it's why a lot of authors don't read them. Those people don't matter. But it's hard, I know. Writing is very personal, and only last week one of my friends told me 'I don't know what's going on' and it stung like hell! I was upset, disagreed with him, argued, and then realised hmm maybe he has a point, and then I went and changed some bits haha! (but his confusion was caused by the aforementioned death-edits - so I actually had to add more stuff back).
Anyway, what I'm saying is...pick and choose what you want to listen to. It will get easier the more you write. And if you really want advice, the best people to go to are professionals. Cornerstones do great services, and mini edits/reviews.
Also, if you're getting too close to your MS, put it away for a week/month and come back to it. I always used to ignore this advice when it was given to me, but eventually when I did, my brain was a lot clearer and more objective when I read it again.
I hope this helps x