Human - Poem

by Robbie Stratford
29th June 2013

Bloodied, shattered, bent into shape

I'll take what I am as I need what I take

My vision, my goals are there to mislead

You are what I am and I'll never concede

Hate me, don't rate me

I swear I won't die

Take hold out my hand

But don't look in my eye

Choice, decision, freedom to try

These are the founding rules I designed

May that you think that path that you chose

Was a conscious belief that your in control

Money driven, arrogance, selfish you are

The three of these will not set you apart

Brothers in arms, sisters unite

Helpless and hopeless you share the same light

Cursed, victim, fated christian

I spat in your face

Believe what you will

But everyone is to blame

Do not fear

For it's not your fault

You were made in my name

Can you guess what i'm called?

Death, the grim reaper, satan I employ

Am I the devil?

Or am I a pawn

Comments

I like it.

Profile picture for user natalie__10012
Natalie
Wilson
270 points
Starting out
Film, Music, Theatre, TV and Radio
Short stories
Fiction
Business, Management and Education
Autobiography, Biography and Memoir
Middle Grade (Children's)
Picture Books (Children's)
Comic
Crime, Mystery, Thriller
Speculative Fiction
Adventure
Gothic and Horror
Romance
Natalie Wilson
01/07/2013

I really enoyed the rhythm, the way you experimented with rhyme... how the poem begins to become less and question itself and as this happens the rhyme pattern breaks apart... nicely done :)

Profile picture for user sandra-o_26616
Sandra
Egger
270 points
Developing your craft
Film, Music, Theatre, TV and Radio
Poetry
Short stories
Fiction
Crime, Mystery, Thriller
Adventure
Middle Grade (Children's)
Picture Books (Children's)
Speculative Fiction
Historical
Popular science, Social science, Medical Science
Practical and Self-Help
Romance
Autobiography, Biography and Memoir
Sandra Egger
29/06/2013

Hi Robbie, This is a credit to you my friend, you have chosen your subject matter very well and put the word to this poem very smoothly indeed.

It flows well and reads well, the words for me coincide with the images that spring to mind as I reflect on their meaning and content.

Well done Robbie keep up the good work, and I look forward to reading more of your work if this is the quality.

Thank You my friend.

Profile picture for user gordonmr_23773
Gordon
Bailey
330 points
Starting out
Poetry
Short stories
Fiction
Crime, Mystery, Thriller
Adventure
Autobiography, Biography and Memoir
Middle Grade (Children's)
Picture Books (Children's)
Comic
Media and Journalism
Business, Management and Education
Speculative Fiction
Historical
Gothic and Horror
Philosophy and Religion
Romance
Gordon Bailey
29/06/2013