Every time I see her, it's like another part has gone. Memories that were once so vibrant and cherished are now like a faded picture, edges all worn and clouded, brown stains covering the detail, like a sheet of fogged glass has been placed over them.
Sometimes, I see a glimmer of what once was and we laugh, and we cry, and we talk about the times that were good and bad. And then, as quickly as it came, it goes. It may appear again, but we'll never know for sure if it will, until it does. Some may become twisted, ideas and words and images crossed, the lines between several realities blurred. Others may be repeated, even seconds later. Or perhaps, the picture has been torn into pieces, worn away so deeply that only fragments remain, the shards now something we'll never get back.
But we keep smiling and we keep hoping, even though we know in our hearts, that this is goodbye.
And the longest one we'll ever say.
Bethan, thanks for sharing your work.
Here is a picture of dementia, and those on the outside doing what people always do: keep on smiling until it hurts, and hopelessly hoping.
I'd change the first paragraph. You have 'like' three times in three lines. Try 'It's as though...' which gets rid of one of them, but you're mixing your metaphors with 'like a faded picture... like a sheet of fogged glass'. Try:
'Memories that were once so vibrant and cherished are now like a faded picture, edges all worn and clouded, brown stains covering the detail, and a sheet of fogged glass placed over it.'
'them' is wrong, as you're referring to the picture (singular), not to the memories (plural).
'It may appear again, but we'll never know for sure if it will, until it does.' - 'until it does' sits a little awkwardly here; it implies a result that is far from the reality.
You've gone from 'it' (the glimmer) to 'some', which doesn't refer to anything: some what?
'all worn'...'worn away' - be careful of repetition unless it is deliberate.
Hope this helps.
Lorraine