May the Source Be with You: A Filmic Guide to Change Your Life

[NOTICE

DAWUD HAMID GUREVITCH hereby asserts and gives notice of his right under s.77 of the Copyright, Design and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this excerpt.

D.H.Gurevitch

DAWUD GUREVITCH

31st January 2013.]

Endorsements

“The content of this powerful book is as unique as its title….It is obvious that Dawud has spent a lot of time in selecting and researching the films to support his themes of growth for his readers, making the journey of life change interesting, entertaining, enlightening and relevant….This book is a rip-roaring adventure.” (Curly Martin, Director, Business and Life Coach, Mentor and Trainer, and international best-selling Author of The Life Coaching Handbook, The Business Coaching Handbook and The Personal Success Handbook)

“An extensive, intensive and very interesting book.” (Maria Round, Weight Watchers Leader and Life Coach)

“An engaging read: really interesting, totally unique, thought-provoking and empowering.

Inception is a perfect example in identifying the need to believe in oneself and one's goals, and the power in visualising that success in order to make it real. But also highlighting the importance of being surrounded by positive people to help us to 'see' the way and to bring us up to their positive and optimistic level: to break free of a primitive and limiting mind.

I will surely be using the techniques outlined nearer the end as I could use some more neurolinguistic programming; I have had some experience and success in the past with changing the patterns of my mind to positive ones, and it was nice to have the techniques re-emphasised here. I still have some way to go but your book helped me to get fully back on track and feel the excitement of an unknown future where anything can happen when I have the power to create it.

Thanks for the insight and inspiration!” (Robert Yates, Screenwriter)

“Wow! I really enjoyed reading this.

I believe you've written a very inspiring, intelligent, clever, and interesting book, which will give something to everyone who gets to read this.

For me what stood out is that I found it very thought-provoking, reading about how to actually change ways of thinking to reality and this made me really think about how I think, and challenged me in a way I really feel I need to be challenged right now.

I know that being lucky or blessed isn't enough if a person doesn't use all that they have been given, and to use all that we've been given means opening our eyes for the first time maybe, and seeing it, and accepting it, and embracing it.

I know, for me, that reading your book has touched things in my heart and mind that were already stirring anyway, and so I feel blessed for getting to read it and think on about what I need to do for me and my life, and for my happiness.

I hope, and believe, that lots of people in this world get to read this, so that they get to share in its inspirational points.” (Nicola Gurevitch-Beacock, Saleswoman)

“Dawud is an exceptional Life Coach….” Ross Thompson, Farmer, Educator and Author)

[Dedications]

To the Ultimate Warrior of Truth, Love, Joy and Peace, Who has no name yet many, and Who is the Source of us all.

And to all those who are courageous and committed to working hard for change, being the best that they can be, and living the remainder of their lives to its fullest possible potential.

Acknowledgements

I wish to thank the exceptional, top-ten, international best-selling Author, Director, Business and Life Coach, Mentor and Trainer that is Curly Martin firstly for motivating, inspiring and empowering me, not only to train, qualify and now work as a Life Coach, but also to research and write this book for others to enjoy and benefit from, and secondly for writing the foreword below.

I also wish to thank the following people: my ex-wife, who respected the time and space I needed to start researching and writing this book when we were still married; Robert Yates for giving me access to most of the selected films’ screenplays; Emma Wadsworth, my ex-live-in landlady, for being ace when I was writing some of the book while living in her home; Nicki Croote and Maria Round, who each coached me during the early phases of writing this book; Denise Cox for her inspiring suggestions as to how to improve this book as well as what to base the third book in this series of books on; and my family, especially my nan, my mother and my two older sisters, who each gave me useful feedback and encouragement.

And, naturally, I want to thank you, dear reader, for reading – and acting on – my message.

I wish you every success now and forever.

Keep well,

Dawud

Foreword

The content of this powerful book is as unique as its title.

Dawud uses infotainment – a style that combines information and entertainment – to explore life’s journey, with all its ups and downs. He has selected his films carefully so that he can extract scenes which support the topic of each chapter. Each extract is put into context (in case the reader is unfamiliar with the film – although he does suggest that the reader watches the films for themself) using dialogue and background notes.

I will not write about the details of the themes of each chapter nor the films which support the themes because I believe Dawud covers this very succinctly in his Chapter One. What adds an extra level of realism to each chapter and therefore the book are the case studies based on some of his previous clients as well as other people. The case studies take the reader from the world of film to the everyday world, thus giving the reader the confidence that even they can achieve real, lasting change.

The chapters are punctuated by practical exercises that will move the reader from the passive (reading) to the active (participating in exercises), allowing them to take responsibility in changing themself and their life by following step-by-step, easy-to-do exercises, which echo or elucidate the theme of each chapter and film extract.

It is obvious that Dawud has spent a lot of time in selecting and researching the films to support his themes of growth for his readers, making the journey of life change interesting, entertaining, enlightening and relevant.

This book is a rip-roaring adventure.

Curly Martin

www.curlymartin.com

[Opening quotation]

“Tough times never last but tough people do.

You can achieve your ambitions if you just put your mind to it and focus.

You need determination, drive, motivation and the ability to dig deep to overcome challenges.

You need a strong work ethic.

And you need to be prepared to do more than your rivals.

Look to perform beyond your wildest dreams and anything is possible.” (Dame Sarah Storey, Olympian and Paralympian)

Exposition

Chapter One: Introduction

May the Source Be with You: A Filmic Guide to Change Your Life. Striking title. But now you want to know what the title means. Well, this is your life. I am a professional, non-directive and holistic Life Coach; that is, someone qualified, experienced and skilled in the process of inspiring, motivating and empowering people to think, speak and act more positively and confidently in all aspects of their personal and professional lives, which in turn, for example, can lead them to being healthier, wealthier, happier, more fulfilled, and more balanced. And the main way that I will do this with you throughout the course of this book is by drawing upon the main positive messages contained within ten truly inspiring, motivating and empowering films, and by putting forward for your consideration a wide selection of practical exercises.

As with any good narrative, the story of your life as it is this moment begins in medias res or “in the middle of things” rather than with your birth, conception or creation. You are, indeed, a unique individual, who has come to this book with a unique combination of gifts, talents, abilities, skills sets, qualifications, work and life experiences, positive attributes, and much, much more. And, yet, if you are committed to working hard for change, being the very best that you can be, and living out the rest of your life to its fullest potential, then this book will assist you by providing you with some welcome inspiration and the motivation to take action. For, as I read recently,

“Some people dream of success, while others wake up and work hard to achieve it.” (Unknown original Author)

Consider this book, then, as your personal wake-up call to action! Whatever your current levels of knowledge and understanding about the inspirational worlds of film and life coaching, this book will provide you with infotainment – that is, information and entertainment – which has the potential to challenge and even to change the way you think about, talk about, and live out your life; that is: Chapter Two, which is based on the film Peaceful Warrior as well as the books Way of the Peaceful Warrior and The Power of Now, has the potential to integrate your mind, body and spirit, resulting in you feeling more love, joy and peace; Inception demonstrates the nature and importance of your beliefs, including believing in yourself, and can literally empower you to turn your dreams into realities; Yes Man is all about how saying “Yes” more often can change your life for the better; Erin Brockovich reminds us how life will always be a struggle but that you can fight hard and win big; Into the Wild shows us how important what you plan on doing with your one wild and precious life really is; The Shawshank Redemption reveals why fear can effectively hold you prisoner, and how hope can give you strength and effectively set you free; The Pursuit of Happyness illustrates how you can actually achieve greater health, wealth and happiness; Eat Pray Love is an exceptional example of how reinventing yourself – several times over if necessary – can change your life; I Don't Know How She Does It demonstrates the importance of making your goals S.M.A.R.T. (that is, Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, and Time-limited); and, The Bucket List shows us how, no matter what your current chronological age and mental, physical and spiritual or emotional conditions, your life still has opportunities in it for you.

As with all of these films, each chapter of this book – like the book itself – is structured as a narrative; that is, with an exposition, rising action, crisis, climax, and resolution. Furthermore, each chapter contains within it a varying number of practical self-help principles, tools and techniques that you can practice as and when you are ready, willing and able to; for example, Chapter Two includes, among other things, the importance of being fully present, of eating well, of exercising regularly, and of meditating, whether you already consider yourself a religious and/or spiritual person or not. Chapter Three focuses on, again among other things, the nature and importance of affirmations and visualisations. Chapter Seven includes several suggestions as to how you can manage natural feelings of fear by drawing upon various sources of strength and hope in your life. And Chapter Nine outlines the nature and importance of sometimes reinventing yourself – as extremely difficult as this can sometimes be – in order, ultimately, to be more healthy, happy, fulfilled, and mentally, physically and spiritually balanced.

Naturally, you cannot possibly do any of the suggested activities in this book unless you put them into action; you could think about doing each and every single one of them, but, unless you are prepared to act on what your head, heart and gut instincts are telling you, you may still feel, for example, like you are stuck in an awful rut, one where negative thoughts and limiting beliefs fill your head like wooden clog dancers, and sometimes all before you've even gotten out of bed in the morning!

Note: Whilst I do not expect you to read the shooting scripts or screenplays and, in some cases, the books that the chosen films are based on, I do suggest watching as many of the films as possible before and/or after reading about them. This is especially important with a film like Inception as, given the film's complex narrative structure, you will have a fuller knowledge and understanding of Chapter Three's subject matter if you see the film, also.

Remember: “The birth of the reader must be at the cost of the death of the Author” (Roland Barthes); that is, for example, whilst I use the ten films I do to build a particular case, I have not (and, indeed, could not have) exhausted all the different ways that they can be interpreted, related to, and so on, and so forth. In other words, to some extent, you are your own, best film user and critic. The same is true even of this book; that is, whilst I have taken great care in choosing the films for inspiration, their order in the book, and how each one relates to certain life coaching practices, you are the best person to adapt the reading experience to suit your needs and desires. So, for example, if you choose to read the whole book, in order, acting on each and every self-management tool contained within it, fantastic! If, however, you only take one life-enhancing technique away with you to practice, fine! And, as it is a self-help book, it's determining successes in your life rely upon you applying the suggested practical exercises in moderation as well as with some skill and common sense, especially when saying “Yes” to things – as you will appreciate more once you've read Chapter Four!

Case Study: The Current Author

Regarding how this book transpired, having developed a love of film during my college years, I read Film at university; however, without any real ambition to work in the film industry, I went from one job to another for two years before considering teaching. I first completed three weeks of what was supposed to be observational experience only in two secondary schools, but ended up with me being called to the front of the classrooms and delivering whole lessons to eleven to eighteen year-olds. This experience consolidated my interest in teaching, and I completed my School-Centred Initial Teacher Training (SCITT) with Post-Graduate Certificate in Education (PGCE) the following academic year. Once qualified, I secured the post of Teacher of Humanities and Media Studies in a large, secondary, comprehensive, inner-city school, where I completed my Newly-Qualified Teacher (NQT) or induction year.

Whilst some students’ behaviour was my main challenge for these first two years in teaching, once by the end of the second year I had become much more assertive than came naturally to me, my behaviour management skills were good, resulting in a greater level of teaching and learning, which is of course the name of the game; however, the exceptional desire, drive and determination of my new Principal Designate to turn a “Good” school into an “Outstanding” academy meant that my already extremely heavy workload increased term after term after term. It did, of course, eventually plateau, but it led to me having my own Elizabeth Gilbert moment, not on my bathroom floor at three in the morning, but in my then office at three in the afternoon; I was standing there, and I literally thought to myself, “Is this it until I'm sixty-five!?”. I was thirty years old at the time, and I'd ended up becoming a busy fool in the wrong job. Simultaneously, I'd let my health slip, namely, for the first period of time in my life, by getting out of the habit of taking some form(s) of regular exercise. And, to compound both challenges, my wife and I were experiencing some marital challenges which, as the cyclical nature of things go, resurfaced yet again at springtime and weren't going away.

Regarding changing careers, I started researching job profiles on the National Career Service website and came across “Life Coach”, which immediately spoke to me. I subsequently attended a free, two-day introductory seminar organised by The Coaching Academy – Europe’s largest life coaching training provider, which prompted me to buy and read some life coaching and other self-help and Mind Body Spirit books in general, including Fiona Harrold's first book, Be Your Own Life Coach: How to take control of your life and achieve your wildest dreams. It was by completing the exercises in Fiona’s book regarding my professional life as well as my personal life that, upon reflection, I realised how unhappy I was in both of them, and so I did what Liz Gilbert did; that is, I reinvented myself three times over. Firstly, I bought my dream bicycle with Cyclescheme and started cycling at least sixty miles a week, quickly getting back to a reasonable level of health and fitness. Secondly, I trained as a Smoking Cessation Advisor, Expert Patients Programme (EPP) Tutor, and Life Coach. Thirdly, after a long process of consultation and marital mediation, my wife and I decided to separate and eventually get divorced, which we both agreed were the right things to do for us and our lives.

I am currently thirty-two and live in Stroud, Gloucestershire.

Regarding why this book transpired, I effectively healed myself by changing and moving on with my life, including training, qualifying and now working as a Life Coach. Well, as part of my Life Coaching Handbook (LCH) Diploma, which I acquired through Curly Martin of Achievement Specialists, I had to write an essay on any two life coaching books excluding Curly’s first book, The Life Coaching Handbook. Now, being the film fan that I am, I asked Curly if I could base my essay on one book (Fiona’s Be Your Own Life Coach) and one film (Inception), to which she agreed as long as it demonstrated my research skills as well as my obvious passions for writing, film and life coaching. My essay became what is now Chapter Three of this book, and it inspired me to repeat this process with other chapters based on other films, books as well as some different sources of inspiration and motivation that can now empower you to change your own life situation.