Walking in Fields Thoughts

by Liz Cleaves
7th August 2013

When I lay down

In grass so golden and brown

I could never wear a frown

Even if I get ticks in my hair

It will be nice to have them there.

( There will be a little illustration to go with this )

Comments

Hi there Liz,

This is short and sweet, and I like the idea of having an illustration to go with it. Something I noticed while reading, though, was the change in tense - the first three lines are in past tense, whereas the penultimate line is either present or future, and the final line future. This can easily be remedied without changing the number of syllables in each line, however :-)

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Alice
Cattley
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Poetry
Short stories
Fiction
Alice Cattley
18/08/2013