Ideally this would be an illustrated children's book with two animals discussing what might be. One is in italics, the other is normal text but I'm not sure the difference is clear. This is where the illustrations would come in handy. I'm aware it is 'Pops' and not 'Pox'.
What would happen in Santa got chicken pops?
The ones humans get?
No, no. Not the spots.
Would his tummy explode? Do you think he’s ever touched his toes?
No, No. Stick to the question.
Where was I? Oh yes, chicken pops.
Who would ride Santa’s sleigh?
Could he do it another day?
Go back in time?
He is magic you know.
Chicken pops is not like dots.
Would he give it to his elves?
Poor elves. Poor reindeer. Poor Mrs Claus. They might all get chicken pops.
Does that mean Christmas would stop?
Santa always has a plan. Even in a pickle or jam.
Good old Santa.
Good old Santa.
Thanks Amy, great comments. I'll need to delve deeper. I was inspired by how inquisitive small children are and how they mis-pronounce words. It is supposed to be an infant asking the question - what would happen if Santa got poorly. Really appreciate the feedback. x
I like it. I really like the style, the pace and the wit. I can see the two characters and how innocent and childlike they are. I would just pad it out a bit and make it a bit clearer what they are talking about.
'not the spots'
'is not like the dots'
So the characters know they're not talking about chicken pox? Or is he humour that they are mistaking something normal for an illness like chicken pox?
Are they just playing around with the idea that Santa could get ill, if so perhaps pad it out and come up with other possibilities?
Also, instead of just eluding that its not chicken pox, I think you have to give the audience an alternative. What is chicken pops? What are the symptoms if not spots? Thus giving you the opportunity to give witty names to other 'non-illness''
You may have done this already, since this may just be a snippet. And as you said illustration would make it a lot clearer.
Have fun on this comical adventure :)