The Loneliness of the Long-Distance Writer #6

1st March 2012
Blog
3 min read
Edited
8th December 2020

In any drawn-out labour, there comes the time when you need to ask: ‘How am I doing?’

To share or not to share?

In any drawn-out labour, there comes the time when you need to ask: ‘How am I doing?’

Writing is not amenable to an annual assessment and review.  You can’t ask your boss or your colleagues what they think.  So one of the questions I faced after completing that first draft: should I show it to someone and, if so, who?

It was pretty pointless doing that if all I wanted was a pat on the back.  I realised that having my ego stroked, while undeniably welcome, wouldn’t help Grosse Fugue be as good as it could possibly be.  But if I wasn’t planning to publish, why reveal it?  What could it gain?

Well, the truth was simple.  I might have started off with noble intentions of purity of purpose, my high artistic ideals never to be sacrificed on Mammon’s altar.  But the more I wrote, the clearer became the notion that the world should not be deprived of such breathless brilliance, that I owed it to my fellow humans to share my work.  Or, more seriously, that maybe, just maybe, it would no longer be satisfying enough just to write, now I had to be read.

It’s only fair in this sort of confessional to be open and honest.  I did harbour huge ambitions for the book.  Once it was sitting there, I wanted it to make a difference, to challenge as well as to entertain and move.

Two Russians were banging around in my head.  Myakovsky remarked that “Art is not a mirror to reflect the world, but a hammer with which to shape it.”  Perhaps more appositely, Zamyatin said this: “There are books of the same chemical composition as dynamite. The only difference is that a piece of dynamite explodes once, whereas a book explodes a thousand times.”

Well, I wanted my novel to explode a thousand and more times. 

I had decided to postpone the sharing thing until I’d completed a first draft.  Then I started talking to people and, if they seemed genuinely interested, I’d give them a print-out to read.

And then I waited for a response.

I don’t recommend this approach.  Silence can only be interpreted as judgement-by-cowardice.  Some commented constructively, others were enthusiastic.  But I lost count of the number of people who said bugger all.  This was hideous.

So, in the end, I decided to see how literary agents would respond.  That was fun.

Ian Phillips is a freelance writer for businesses whose first novel, Grosse Fugue, will be published by Alliance Publishing Press on April 3rd.  He’s tweeting developments @Ian_at_theWord. 

Writing stage

Comments

Thanks for the clarification and support, Gayle. I can hang up the Samaritans now!

Profile picture for user ian.fish_21614
Ian
Phillips
270 points
Practical publishing
Fiction
Autobiography, Biography and Memoir
Business, Management and Education
Historical
Ian Phillips
04/03/2012

Apologies if I misunderstood, Louise. The sharing of writing is an act of courage. We all lack confidence at some time or another. Although on the cusp of being published, I am frequently racked with self-doubt. In the end, we stand or fall by our work.

I obviously don't know your family dynamics, but with mine, it was enough for me that they knew I had tried my hand at this great enterprise we have all undertaken. I hope that you, too, may soon be in the position to say: You know that book I was trying to write? It's finished!

Profile picture for user ian.fish_21614
Ian
Phillips
270 points
Practical publishing
Fiction
Autobiography, Biography and Memoir
Business, Management and Education
Historical
Ian Phillips
04/03/2012

Thanks for your reply Ian. Just to let you know I accidentally pressed the thumbs down button and it won't let me retract it!! Thumbs up all the way :)

Profile picture for user gayleben_15153
Gayle
Bentham
330 points
Developing your craft
Fiction
Crime, Mystery, Thriller
Adventure
Middle Grade (Children's)
Picture Books (Children's)
Media and Journalism
Speculative Fiction
Autobiography, Biography and Memoir
Gayle Bentham
04/03/2012