Hi,
Firstly, I am new to this site, so hello! Now here is my question.
When writing in the first person, should it sound as though the narrator is actually talking, or should it be more formal? The reason I ask is that I have had someone take a look at my work and they have suggested that some language which is common when speaking looks out of place in print. Here is an example:
I went back to the car. changed to...
I returned to the car.
The cafe was done up in a victorian style. changed to...
The cafe was decorated in a Victorian style.
It was not as tasty and greasy as what you got in the canteen. changed to
It was not as indulgent and greasy as what was served in the canteen.
Would the first sentences look bad to an editor? Initially I agreed, but on changing a whole chapter I now worry that it reads more like a report than someone telling a story.
I appreciate without more context it may be difficult to offer advice, but I would appreciate knowing if there is some standard expectation about avoiding verbs with prepositions when in the narrators voice, or if it just comes down to choosing a particular style and staying consistent with it.
Thank you for any help you can give.
Colin
I would say even in the third person the narrator has a voice, though distinct from the characters it should still sound natural and avoiding contractions as a rule would make it unnatural and unrealistic.
With a first person narrator, it's perfectly allowable to use contractions - if his voice suits them. It depends on how close to his natural voice you're getting. If, as I said, there's a distancing between his speech and the narrative, you can avoid contractions so long as it doesn't sound clunky and unnatural.
If in doubt, read aloud. It really does help!
Lorraine
Thanks Lorraine,
That's interesting. Could I just clarify something? I thought that it was generally advised to avoid contractions in the narrative. Is an exception made when it's first person narrative?
Colin