At one of music lessons, my teacher surprised me one day by asking me to play all the wrong notes, not to focus on getting it perfect, but to hit that note wrong, and on purpose. When I asked her why, she said that by learning to hit all the wrong notes, I would know what to avoid, that it's easier to avoid what you know than what you don't, and for music this turned out to be true.
The question I want to ask is: what wrong notes/ annoys you concerning the structure of writing?
Personally for me, I can't stand an overuse of the word 'like', as in, 'it was like this' and 'it was like that'.
I think that by learning what we don't like, we discover a little more about our own personal styles :)
That reminds me of an amusing story.
Eric Morecambe had Andre Previn by the scruff of the neck and said, 'I'm playing all the right notes, but not necessarily in the right order.' I'm sure the clip from the Morecambe and Wise show is on YouTube.
'it was like this' and 'it was like that'. What was like this, or like that? I need to know the context of the sentence.
Use 'as if' instead of 'like' even if you have to reword the sentence.
Passive sentences have their uses, but it's important to write in the Active Voice. The Active Voice is usually more direct and vigorous than the passive. The habitual use of the Active Voice, however, makes for forcible writing. Many a tame sentence or exposition can be made lively and emphatic by substituting a transitive in the Active Voice.
Problems of style appeared during many edits of my manuscript. I, too, found passive sentences in amongst chunks of text. They had to be reworded in the Active Voice or cut.
I highly recommend, 'The Elements of Style' by William Stunk Jr and E B White, the author of 'Charlotte's Web'. It will definitely improve your style. I bought a used copy of the Fourth Edition on Amazon. It's full of excellent examples.
I hope that helps.
Good luck.