Do any on Orwell's list below apply to you?
Orwell lists "four great motives for writing" which he feels exist in every writer. He explains that all are present, but in different proportions, and also that these proportions vary from time to time. They are as follows:
1.Sheer egoism- Orwell argues that a writer writes from a "desire to seem clever, to be talked about, to be remembered after death, to get your own back on grown-ups in childhood, etc." He says that this is a motive the writer shares with scientists, artists, lawyers - "the whole top crust of humanity" - and that the great mass of humanity, not acutely selfish, after the age of about thirty abandons individual ambition. A minority remains however, determined 'to live their own lives to the end, and writers belong in this class.' Serious writers are vainer than journalists, though "less interested in money".
2.Aesthetic enthusiasm- Orwell explains that the present in writing is the desire to make one's writing look and sound good, having "pleasure in the impact of one sound on another, in the firmness of good prose or the rhythm of a good story." He says that this motive is "very feeble in a lot of writers" but still present in all works of writing.
3.Historical impulse- He sums this up stating this motive is the "desire to see things as they are, to find out true facts and store them up for the use of posterity."
4.Political purpose- Orwell writes that "no book is genuinely free from political bias", and further explains that this motive is used very commonly in all forms of writing in the broadest sense, citing a "desire to push the world in a certain direction" in every person. He concludes by saying that "the opinion that art should have nothing to do with politics is itself a political attitude."
I confess that 1&4 apply to me.
I write because I like good stories and I enjoy making them up. For me writing is a form of play that lingers from childhood, just without the props of toys.
If you're not all sick of me by now: I neglected to tackle the aesthetic aspect. I'll keep it short:
I love a good pun, I love alliteration, I love leading people to believe that I've said something that I haven't actually said... and then letting them know it. I love poetry that scans and rhymes and yet doesn't lose sight of what it's trying to say. Is that aesthetic?
p.s.OF COURSE I questioned the Church... and do my reading elsewhere these days. (Jesus was pretty much spot-on: it's the Church that corrupted his message.)