The Feel of Fiction

In my debut children’s book, The Unexpected Tale of Bastien Bonlivre, I understood (I hope!) the importance of setting a strong tone for the world of my book, as well as creating powerful moods. Every writer wants their readers to feel something.

When I started writing my first draft, I got bogged down in learning technical creative writing terms. Despite working in publishing, my role has always been very far removed from the whole editorial process and my memories of GCSE English were hazy at best. So I did away with the panicked Google searches and decided to just write. I would, I declared to myself, feel my way through the story.

So what exactly is tone? And how do we know, as writers, whether we're getting it right? And as for mood, what do we want our readers to feel when reading a certain chapter or scene?

Tone in fiction can probably be best described as the attitude of your writing, in particular the attitude of your main character - or narrative voice - towards your narrative. Think of it as not being so different from the tone of your voice when you're speaking; in conversation it's not always about what we say but how we say it. Remember when you thanked your nan for showing your new partner embarrassing photos of you doing number two's in the bath as a baby? I'm guessing that you weren't really that thankful. Nice one Nan.

Anyway, back on track...

Tone can be achieved by the words you choose and how you construct your sentences. Every adjective, adverb, metaphor and simile you use - and the imagery that this all creates - will show readers who you are, as a writer, and what your characters are about.

Mood is what your readers will feel when reading your story. I like to think of mood as a sort of atmospheric steam that rises up from the pages and infuses your reader's senses. 

To strengthen my tone and work on creating mood, I usually start at a micro-level and develop the story sentence by sentence. My main character Bastien Bonlivre is bookish, loves writing and telling stories, although he is fairly anxious and lacking somewhat in the bravery department at the beginning of the story. This sentence example appears at the beginning of the book:

'Limiting what he read was like asking the roses in the Luxembourg Gardens not to grow: it was simply against his nature.'

I wanted to show that Bastien doesn't just like reading, it is a fundamental, unchangeable part of who he is. Along with establishing the backdrop of Paris and the enchanting atmosphere this evokes, this simple sentence establishes Bastien's tone by showing his attitude towards his current situation. 

Another example of tone and mood working well together comes about half-way through the story when Bastien, Theo and Sami find themselves in the tunnels underneath Paris:

'"Here is the Empire of Death," Theo muttered. "Doesn't sound too appealing, I'll be honest. You're sure Monsieur Xavier didn't go down another tunnel?"'

Theo Larouche is Bastien's best friend. Bravery comes a bit more natural to Theo, but he's still freaked out at the prospect of walking through underground tunnels. I wanted to show his resilience and ability to joke around, even in a scary situation. For me, balancing a mysterious, ominous mood with a light-hearted tone is crucial. That's how I've always dealt with life, both as a child and now as an adult - although I'll still deny I am one if you ask me! As a writer of children's fiction, I think the balance is all the more important. Children are brilliantly resilient and are endlessly curious, even if they are a bit frightened at the same time. 

I'm by no means an expert, but the best learning process on nailing your tone and establishing moods to give your readers all of the feels is simple: read, read, and then do more reading. Here are some best in class examples from a variety of children's fiction and YA books that I love. I hope these will help you understand more about tone and mood as well as inspire you in your own writing.

BLOOM by Nicole Skinner

'Her voice was as stripped down and colourless as a pizza base without any toppings.’

Sorrel’s mum works in the town’s pizza factory. Here, the job of a character intersects with their own mood; Sorrell's mum has had enough, just as you would be if you were given a pizza base without any toppings in a restaurant. This simile is brilliant in its specificity as we are: 1) reminded of what Sorrell's mum does for a living 2) told that Sorrell's mum is exhausted and not feeling great and 3) given a brilliant mental image of a nasty, plain pizza base. That evokes a whole mood. 

Rather than using a generic simile or comparison, the author has dug deeper into the heart of their story by using the character's job to reflect how they feel.

THE GOOD THIEVES by Katherine Rundell

'Vita set her jaw and nodded at the city in greeting, as a boxer greets an opponent before a fight.'

This is the opening sentence of The Good Thieves, so Katherine Rundell really does knock it out of the park with this one on multiple levels. We are immediately introduced to our main character, Vita, and the comparison of her to a boxer is so powerful. This line already tells us so much about her. Readers get a sense of Vita, a strong-headed protagonist who is ready for whatever this city might bring her, even if there will be hardships and obstacles - akin to a boxer's punch - along the way. 

EIGHT PIECES OF SILVA by Patrice Lawrence

'Sometimes I think it's weird that me and Raych are still mates. We're an unexpected friendship, a bit like Legolas and Gimli.'

Eight Pieces of Silva has a contemporary, engaging tone and we see Becks's (our main character) fangirling personality. She loves K-pop and makes lots of pop culture references. Comparing her friendship to one of the most unexpected/love-to-hate cinema friendships gives us readers an instant understanding of Becks and Raych and the dynamic between them. 

Do you have any examples of your own? Whether from your writing or favourite books? Share in the comments below!

Fancy putting some of these thoughts and ideas into practice? Click here for a writing exercise

Clare Povey is the author of The Unexpected Tale of Bastien Bonlivre, a middle grade mystery adventure set in 1920's Paris. Clare grew up on the border of where East London meets Essex. After studying French and living in Northern France to teach English in primary schools, she joined the Writers & Artists team at Bloomsbury Publishing to grow their writing and publishing events and is now Editorial & Communities Manager at W&A.