This is the blurb for my story Crimson Wing;
Heidi Cole lived a quiet life in the middle of Ivy forest until the shape shifting Prince Ibis crash lands near her home. After saving his life Heidi sets out with him to help him escape a band of sky pirates known as Crimson Wings lead by the malevolent Captain Shani.
What do you all think?
You've told the bones of the story, which is fine (your first 'lived' ought to be present tense 'lives') but it depends what the blurb's intended for.
I'd have said yours is more very short synopsis. 'Blurb' tends to be advertising-speak for 'grab a reader without letting on what happens' so in this respect you've told us too many exciting bits :)
That's one reason good blurb is hard to write (so are synopses, but that's a slightly different story) - you have to say who your characters are and what happens without giving too much away.
I hate writing them. Bet others do, too :(
Best of luck with your story :)
Thank for the input, I have put the first chapter up on here to see what people think of it.
*don't know your story, rather - sorry, I'm tired too! :-)