Adrian posted a question about first chapters, but what about opening sentences? Anyone brave enough to post theirs for comparison?
Since I'm asking, I'll take the early flak.
From Walls of Jericho - 'Louis-Henri Loison could not die.'
From Leopardkill - '"Another dead 'un over here!"'
From Dog Watch (WIP) - '"It is vital, major, this letter be delivered."'
From Hand of the Baptist (WIP) - 'Staring intently towards Valetta's distant guardian wall, General Napoleon Bonaparte leaned against L'Orient's rail, his grip alternately tense then relaxed as the French flagship dipped and rose on a gentle Mediterranean swell.'
The last one's too long, but that's early days yet ;)
Jennifer I've just read your short story - I found it very powerful and edgy. The narrator's voice is very strong. The story is well structured and economical and the voice is totally convincing - very well done! I've tried several times, to find your prologue which you said you posted here - I found your story when I pressed 'view work'. So I can't imagine where else the prologue could be???? Please enlighten a person who is anything but savvy on these matters!!!
Constantin,
I love the contrast between the fear and the everyday in the opening sentence of "Drawings". The milk bottles contrast so well with the fear and egneral foreboding and really heighten the atmosphere. Made me stop and think.
Similarly, in "Hiding Places" I love how the flourescent balloon moon is so startling and effective, coming as it does after the description of something ordinary (the walk up the hill).
Fantastic and intriguing openings.
Constantine, I like opening line is, there is a lot going on.
'We were soon climbing the snowy hill. My mother was first, struggling with the pushchair. Then came Marius, holding Elly who was crying for her doll and pointing to the distant house. I was following them, dragging after me the imperfect circle of the moon, like a fluorescent balloon.'